No. Yes! Yes, he’s doing much better now. Thank you.
Alright, that’s…that’s good to hear. I’m glad you found what you were looking for, Adam.
Oh. That’s… sudden. Um, look, Em’s leaving the castle for the week. His family wants him back home for something or another - I dunno, didn’t ask - but, I mean if you want, I can stay with you in the apartment for a while. We can chat, maybe go to the junkyard and smash some cars up, or we could pop in a romance movie and cry over how love conquers all or put in an angsty movie and cry about how love sucks.
Yeah, sudden as fuck. To be honest when he said he was offered the position I didn’t think-I didn’t think he’d take it…I mean here is home, right? Hogwarts us home, our house was home, home is supposed to be where the heart is, right? I just…I’m still not entirely believing this is really happening.
That’d be nice, yeah. I haven’t hung out with you in a while, kiddo. I guess that’s more my fault than yours, isn’t it? Sorry. Rain check the junkyard, I don’t think I have the energy to beat anything up right now. The movies would be nice.
I really want a drink, Oz. Real bad.
Oh good, you had me worried for a second there. You honestly didn’t need to get me anything though, Dex. I’m perfectly fine with the things I’ve got.
Ozzy, the adoption came through. You’re my kid now. You’re-all you’ve gotta do is sign this -hands him a form with a bow at the corner- and you’ll be a D’Angelo. Merry Christmas, kiddo.
Written on the back:“Insta boner material.”
Oh. My. G-And this is why you’re my favorite. DONE.
Oh Muggles have great music too, wow.
Nothing that just came out of your mouth made any sense to me right there, you’re starting to sound like Adam.
You sure you’re talking about the same Hogwarts I know? Because the last time I checked everything you just said, except for the part about Chelsea, matches the description of Hogwarts as well.
Well, it’s different for me as staff, what with being given a paycheck, free food and shelter year round and what not. It’s certainly more comfortable than paying rent for a shitty flat and having annoying as fuck neighbors and not having feasts in a massive hall for every meal.
You got into a fight. Seriously?
Why, yes I did.
MY CAT JUST DIED. I HAVE MORE OF A RIGHT TO BE YELLING HERE. WOW, JUST LET ALL THE THINGS OUT TONIGHT. YOU KNOW WHAT? SCREW YOU DEX. I RAMBLE. DEAL WITH IT. YOU RAMBLE AS WELL. DON’T ACT ALL INNOCENT IN THIS SITUATION. WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?! THAT’S NOT POSSIBLE. IS HE LIKE RIPPING HIS EYE OUT AND PUTTING IT ON HIMSELF?! THAT’S THE ONLY WAY IT’D WORK. YES HE WOULD. HE’S NO SUPERMAN, HE’S LEX LUTHER. EVIL EVIL CAT. GET THAT THING AWAY FROM ME. IT KILLED MY CAT.
THERE IS. IT’S SOMETHING LONG AND COMPLICATED. I MEAN, WHO CAN REMEMBER IT ON A REGULAR DAY LET ALONE WHEN I FEEL LIKE DYING. NO YOU GO THINK OF IT. ISN’T THAT WHAT I JUST SAID?! I SAID I’D SNEAK OUT FIRST. SHUT UP, DYING IN THE HALLWAY ISN’T CONVENIENT FOR THE CARETAKER. THEN I’M JUST LYING THERE DEAD. I HOPE SO. THAT’D BE NICE. IT’D MAKE DYING WORTH IT.
YOU THINK MY CAT KILLED YOUR CAT SO I HAVE A RIGHT TO BE YELLING HERE TOO CAUSE MY CAT IS BLOODY INNOCENT-OK, THAT WAS VERY BAD TERMINOLOGY TO USE RIGHT THERE, PRETEND I DIDN’T JUST SAY THAT. I AM DEALING WITH IT. RIGHT NOW. I’M DEALING WITH BRAT MODE RIGHT NOW TOO. OH YEAH, I WENT THERE. FUCKIN BRAT MODE. MAYBE. HE. IS. YOU NEVER KNOW. HIS NAME ISN’T ALEXANDER JOSEPH FOR A REASON, WENTWORTH. IT’S KALEL. CAUSE HE’S SUPERMAN. HE’S A HERO. MY CAT. IS A FUCKING HERO.
MAYBE YOU SHOULD THINK OF IT. IT WOULD KEEP YOUR MIND BUSY AND HELP YOU COPE WITH THIS TERRIBLE LOSS. NO YOU SAID YOU’D DRINK IN HIS APARTMENT THEN SNEAK OUT AND THEN DIE. WELL WHO CARES WHAT’S CONVENIENT FOR ARMSTRONG. I’M PRETTY SURE EVEN HE DOESN’T CARE, THE SIMPLETON. MEETING YOUR STUPID CAT WOULD MAKE DEATH WORTH IT? WOW HOW SAD IS YOUR EXISTENCE. HOW SAD IS IT OXXY. HOW SAD.